Kurosaki Hoo-ah Dinner Thank You
by Yemi Hikari
Summary: Ichigo and Rukia want to announce something over a nice dinner with the rest of the Kurosaki family. They didn't expect the rest of the family though to bring home guests. Karin brings home Toshiro along with someone whose supposed to be dead. Isshin brings home a young man and young women who look strange. Yuzu brings home others to the chaos. (Also crossed over with One Piece)


_Disclaimer – I don't own Bleach, Naruto or One Piece. This story was written for the sixteenth Wattpad fanfic contest where one needed to write a Thanksgiving story or a story which features a crazy family meal which was 3,000 words or less._

 _One of the suggested prompts, "[fandom A] invites [fandom B] to Thanksgiving dinner. Hilarity ensues" caught my eye. I thought using Shounen Jump fandoms would cause a good deal of "hilarity", but also felt to many fandoms would prove to chaotic, so I picked the Big Three. Due to how short this one-shot needed to be a lot of "hows" were left unexplained, like how a certain someone was alive, or how the three fandoms ended up in the same world together, but part of the hilarity comes from the unexpected of this one._

 **Kurosaki Hoo-Ah Dinner Thank You**

"How do you think your family will take the news?"

Ichigo blinked a couple of times as Rukia's words brought him out of his enjoyment of the peaceful quite permeating the Kurosaki residence. "How will they react?" The orange haired youth looked around taking in the fact his father and sisters were strangely missing. "I told Yuzu you were coming to dinner to announce something, so she's likely out shopping. Dad's though the one I'm worried about.

"Things will go fine Ichigo." Rukia sat down at the kitchen table.

"This is my family though. Nothing ever goes normally with them."

…

A small, white haired youth sat crouched on top of the railing preventing the people walking the path from falling to the street level a few feet below. Two bright teal eyes stared down at the tall figure who stared right back up at him. The person stood with their arms crossing their chest, and continued to glare at the younger person. "When are you going to stop acting in such a melancholy manner? This really isn't funny you know Toshiro, and we really need to talk."

"I don't need to talk to someone whose supposed to be dead."

The words came out of the boy's mouth in a quick manner as Toshiro continued to glare at the man. The reaction from the young man made the rather tall figure flinch. "Oh, come on."

Silence fell between the two, and would have continued had not another voice pierced the silence. "Toshiro, what the hell are you doing?"

The rather tall figure started, and then took in the way the white haired youth's expression changed. "Kurosaki."

The dark haired youth shook her head. "Seriously, what are you up there of all places for?"

"He's refusing to talk to me." The tall figure watched as the young lady turned to look at him straight in the eye.

Toshiro of course had something to say about the matter. "I'm not talking to someone whose dead."

"I told you, not my fault."

"You should talk to him Toshiro. As such both of you are coming back to our place."

"Say what!" Both responded to her words.

…

They knew nothing regarding what hit him. How Hinata and Naruto even found themselves lost in this strange place they did not know, but one thing Hinata did know was that some rather large metal beast came hurtling around the corner as Naruto stepped into the street upon seeing what was obviously a ramen shop, and then there was a large amount of ensuing chaos.

Naruto's name came out of her mouth as a squeak, and soon the strangers in the land came crowding around wondering what happened to the young man. Someone said, " _call an ambulance_ ", and another when someone said to "check for a pulse" said, "what's the point when the person will get up without their being any." A person also came out of the metal beast and said something about the boy coming out of nowhere.

Another one of the metal creatures with flaring lights came hurtling out of nowhere, and Hinata almost used her Byakugan to see inside of the metal beast, but stopped short when someone asked her if she were the boy's boyfriend. Her face flushed up as someone commented on the strange whisker like marks on the boy's face, but soon she found herself and Naruto bustled onto the thing called an ambulance.

A hiccup escaped her lips as she sat in a chair, and finally someone they called a doctor came out. The man at first grumbled about being forced to do extra clinic duties at the hospital by someone named Ryuken, but then he came over and smiled at her. He held his thumb up. "You're friend's gonna be all right! Since the two of you are strangers here, why don't the two of you come over to my families place for dinner?"

Hinata simply nodded her head.

…

"I want food."

Sanji watched drool come out of Luffy's mouth, and drip down onto the sidewalk. One hand pushed down into his pants pocket as the other held a cigarette to his lips. "We don't have the money, so we can't buy the food." Tucking the cigarette in his lip the man grabbed Luffy with his one free hand, and attempted to pull him away from the grocery store. The blond haired man stopped short upon seeing a small female staring at him. "What do you want?"

"Your friend said he's hungry," the brown haired female piped up. "My name's Kurosaki Yuzu by the way."

"Well, what of it?"

"The two of you could join my family for dinner tonight. I'm out shopping for food."

"Yeah, what's the condition."

"Condition?" Yuzu blinked a couple of times. "I guess you wouldn't be allowed to smoke in the house."

"I thought so." Sanji tried leaving, but Luffy suddenly grabbed his legs.

"Please Sanji! I'm hungry!"

"It's really no trouble. My sister and my dad already told me they have other guests coming as well."

"Please Sanji! Maybe it's the others!"

Sanji let out a sigh, and rubbed the back of his head.

…

Ichigo breathed a sigh of relief when the door to the Kurosaki household opened up, and he heard Karin's voice. "Ichi-nii. I'm home. I brought some guests for dinner as well."

"Yeah. I can sense Toshiro's here from that cold rieatsu of his. Could you tell him the two of you aren't allowed to date?"

"Very funny Ichi-nii. Now stop teasing Toshiro."

Ichigo opened his mouth to say something else just to make Toshiro react even more, but stopped short upon seeing the person standing next to Toshiro. "Who are you?"

"Dead meat."

Ichigo watched as Toshiro headed over to the couch and flopped down next to the orange teen. The white haired youth's arms crossed his chest as his mouth tightened up. The tall figured person let out a sigh. "Now come on Toshiro... I've got to..."

The expression on Rukia's face quickly fell, and she turned her head to look at the person while one finger pointed. "You! You're supposed to be dead."

"Hello to you Rukia." The tall figured person didn't look pleased.

"Alright, so they know you." Ichigo's mouth twisted into a frown. "Who are you?"

Rukia opened up her mouth to answer the question when Yuzu came into the house with two others carrying groceries. The orange haired teen stared at the two strangers, and asked again, "Who are you?"

"I'm hungry."

Ichigo stared at the young man with the straw hat. "Your name is hungry?"

"No, my name is Luffy. I'm hungry." The young man pointed at his mouth opening it wide.

"Where's the kitchen?" the second stranger, not including the person familiar with Rukia and Toshiro, asked.

"Over here," Yuzu cheerfully replied.

The man walked over to the sink to set down his bags, and then proceeded to put his cigarette out in the sink. "What would you like me to do first?"

Ichigo watched as his sister blinked a couple of times. "What do you mean? You two are the guests."

The man reached out to kiss Yuzu's hand making a shiver run down Ichigo's spine. "I would still like to help the young lady."

The orange haired teen glared at the blond haired man, but something told him not to pick a fight with the man. Ichigo soon found himself distracted by the one called Luffy heading to the fridge, and watched as he pulled out the remains of a large turkey Yuzu cooked the night before. The young man then headed to the table. "What are you doing?"

A drumstick already hung from Luffy's mouth. "I'm hungry."

"You'll ruin your appetite."

"No he won't." The blond haired man stated. "My name is Sanji by the way."

Ichigo shook his head rather then saying something, and let Sanji and Yuzu go about their dinner preparations. After some time he heard his father's voice. "It's pretty amazing how fast you're able to heal kid."

"I know. I get that a lot." Someone said, and Ichigo turned his head to see the guests his father also brought home. The male's hair was blond, his arm in a swing, and across his face was strange marks. The girl's hair on the other hand was black as night, her cheeks flushed white, and her eyes looked strange. The person who spoke, spoke again. "Do you have any ramen to eat?"

"Um, well..." Isshin's eyes blinked a couple of times. "I don't think Yuzu-chan is making Ramen tonight."

"Don't worry. It can just be instant ramen. I like any kind of ramen."

Ichigo let out a sigh, and turned his head to look over at Rukia, Toshiro and the tall stranger. All three continued to glare at each other, and Ichigo felt the tension in the room escalate. Luffy looked up from the dinner table at the three. "Something going on."

Toshiro opened his mouth to say something, but Isshin stepped into view of the three. The tall stranger and Isshin suddenly pointed at each other. "You! You're supposed to be dead!"

Ichigo felt his eye twitch as the tension in the room grew even more. He saw Toshiro's eye twitch as well, and watched the white haired youth cross his arms across his chest. The young man with the strange marks brushed passed him, and headed into the kitchen. "Where's the ramen?"

The blond's female companion followed close by, and spoke in an almost inaudible manner. "Naruto-kun... that's not... very polite."

The orange haired teen blinked a couple of times as the girl tried lifting her hand almost as if she meant to grab Naruto's clothes. Ichigo's eyes drifted over to the kitchen where Sanji and Yuzu were discussing the dinner plans. The teen blinked a couple of times upon hearing something about another turkey, stuffing and fish before shaking his head. Naruto walked over. "Are you guys making ramen?"

"Ramen?" Sanji glared at the young man. "Of course not. We don't have the supplies."

"Come on. You've got to have some instant ramen." Naruto's eyes drifted over to Yuzu. "Oh, say. Do you have any instant ramen."

"Oi..." Sanji turned to the young man and let out a curse. "Why are you even asking for that instant ramen stuff? I don't have any of that junk in my kitchen."

Naruto's hand reached out to grab the front of Sanji's clothing as Hinata let out a hiccup from next to Ichigo. "Are you trying to insult ramen?"

Ichigo let out a sigh as the threat of a fight loomed over the room. The orange haired teen didn't notice the tall figure and his dad glaring at each other, nor did he notice Luffy still devouring the cold turkey. Sanji grabbed the front of Naruto's clothing as well. "Insulting ramen? Are you kidding me? You're the one insulting ramen by wanting instant ramen?"

For some reason Naruto suddenly relaxed, and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "Oh. I get your point. There are a few brands though that have unique flavors for instant ramen, and when that's what you can afford, that's what you can afford. It's definitely never as good as the freshly cooked stuff."

The orange haired teen let out a sigh of relief before turning back to his father, and finally he noticed his father staring at the dark haired man. Both looked ready to kill each other, and each had a hand on the others clothing in the same way Naruto and Sanji did. Luffy sat at the table munching away at another turkey leg, and his eyes sparkled as if he looked forward to a fight breaking out. Rukia stood glaring at the two with her arms crossed. The two men stood almost nose to nose, when something happened to distract them.

"Hey, Karin. Could you and your boyfriend set the table?"

Ichigo felt the color drain from his face, and saw the color leave Toshiro's face in the same manner. A startled, almost panicked sound came from the white haired youth's mouth, and yet Karin brushed the whole thing off as if nothing happened.

"Say what?" Isshin and the man spoke at the same time. "There is no way Toshiro's old enough to be dating."

The orange haired teen felt the corner of his mouth twitch. Naruto turned to Yuzu as she and Sanji prepared dinner. "Say, if that's your sister's boyfriend do you want to do a double date sometime?"

The corner of Ichigo's mouth twitched again as Hinata's thin frame fainted away, and landed on the ground with a thud. " _Sorry kiddo, but I doubt this kid dating you is any better then him dating my sister. I don't trust him._ "

Karin finally took interest in the situation and turned to her father and the stranger as Toshiro's thin frame slid down into the couch as his cheeks heated up. "You know, I get the idea for some reason you two know Toshiro, but in case you two idiots haven't noticed, however old Toshiro was when you last saw him is _not_ the age he is now, and he and I are _both_ very much old enough to date, thank you very much, but only if we so choose to."

Isshin's lip trembled, and suddenly the man ran off to the large picture of his dead wife. "Masaki! Our kids keep growing up to fast! It's not fair."

The man on the other hand was another story. "Sorry, but Miyako and my precious Toshiro is _not_ , nor _ever_ will be ready to date."

"Kaien-dono..." Rukia finally choose to speak as the corner of her mouth twitched as Toshiro slid further down into the couch. "That's just _creepy_! And how the hell are you even alive."

"Well..." One of the man's hands reached up to rub the back of his head. "I was trying to explain that to Toshiro. It's complicated."

"I want to hear the story." Luffy slammed his fist down onto the table, and a spoonful of mashed potatoes went flying through the air. How the mashed potatoes ended up on the table Ichigo wasn't sure of, but he certainly was sure of the food fight which broke out.

Rukia let out a sigh before moving over to him with potatoes and stuffing sticking out of her hair. "Alright, so you're right. Things don't go normally at your household. The only two people other then us not fighting are Kaien-dono, and Toshiro-kun. And did your dad and Karin just dump food on both of them?"

Yuzu stood next to Sanji with a dish she'd pulled from the refrigerator. "Wait, but how are we going to hear Ichi-nii and Rukia-nee's announcement."

Everyone froze, and Ichigo noticed that food stuck out of Luffy and Naruto's mouths despite the fact they were also fighting with the food. Each had a rather long roll of french bread, and were standing on the table. The turkey wing dropped from Luffy's face. "Hey mister, I want to hear the announcement."

Ichigo took a deep breath, but thought twice about telling complete strangers the news. Rukia elbowing him in the ribs made his mouth open. "Rukia and I are getting married."

The silence continued for a few more minutes as the color drained from Kaien's face, and everyone went to actually eating the food despite the mess. Toshiro managed to slip away, and change his clothes. The man finally regained his composure and pointed his finger at Ichigo. "There is no way I'm letting Miyako and my..."

The orange haired teen watched as Isshin put Kaien into a head-lock, and whispered something into the man's ear that seemed to pacify the man, but also put him into a foul mood. Ichigo leaned over towards Rukia. "Say, Rukia? Exactly who is that person?"

"That person? I don't know him." The small female's eyes remained wide with shock. "That, is just creepy."

"Seriously, I get the fact he just creeped you out. Who is he?"

"Shiba Kaien, former fukutaicho of the thirteenth division. Why?"

Ichigo felt the color leave his face again. "Good grief. He's also family."

A small foot stomped down onto his making Ichigo let out a yelp. Rukia glared up at him. " _What_ , pray tell, do you mean by that?"

Suddenly he found himself arguing with Rukia. Isshin smiled at the two. "Look, first fight as an official couple."

Kaien of course continued to not look pleased. Karin and Toshiro pretended as if everything were normal, and Yuzu stared at confusion.

Luffy stared at the two. "Ney, isn't that romantic Sanji?"

"I believe you actually have that right."

Hinata muttered something about hoping to marry Naruto, and the blond turned away from paying attention to Yuzu. "Did you say something Hinata?"

Instead her cheeks flushed red as everyone continued to enjoy the odd family meal.


End file.
